Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Jimmy's Bachelor Party

What a walk down memory lane. Flash back ten years and last night's party could have been an exact duplicate. Good times with old friends.

When I was in high school and college, I had an image in my head of what a bachelor party would be like. There would be razzing of the bachelor to commit embarrassing and blackmailable offenses. Friends would be enjoying every second of skin shown as women strut their stuff on stage. None of the bachelor parties I have been to were anything link my imagination predicted, including last night's party.

Most of my friends have been to a strip club or two in their lives, but more to say they have been than to ogle at women. I've still never been, and no Cayne, that isn't an invitation to take me out to a strip club (Thelma and Louise I would not turn down, however). Honestly though, if I went to a club I would probably feel more sorry for the girls than wanting to "make it rain!" on the girls, and that would be a waste.

All the bachelor parties I have been to have been a blast, but none of them have been much different than an ordinary party. We went paint-balling for Marc's. We played video games and drank at each bachelor party. We hit a casino for Marc's.

Tuesday night was Jimmy's party, and we had an amazing time out at the lake, but an outsider looking in wouldn't be able to distinguish it from a birthday party--minus the presents. We swam, we played video games, we played whiffle ball, we grilled, we played piggy wants a signal (a glorified version of hide and seek, that involved a death defying rooftop melee between myself and Wink, because I couldn't remember the fucker's name--had to call out the person's name if you spotted someone), we drank, we drank some more, played poker, then passed out.

Experiencing a few parties that double as bachelor parties make me wonder what kind of bachelor party I'd like to have thrown for me if I get married. Nothing too wild, but I think it would either have to involve a casino or a trip some place if it is an all-guy event. If the bachelor party involves both genders, I think it could be a lot more fun. The primary reason would be me getting to cozy up with all the ladies, my last night a free man and all! Don't get me wrong, an all-dude party would be just fine, but I think getting lots of kisses from lady-friends would really only be allowable on that one night, and I would be a fool to not indulge. Tanya's brother put it quite nicely by envisioning his bachelor party as him and a handful of strippers. 'Fuck friends, just me and the hookers! That'd be a party!'

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Blogger RaisingCayne said...


"...never been" ???!!! That's effing CRAZY TALK!

Contrary to your statement, I believe this post IS actually a prompt to get you a professional lap dance. We need to get you down to Portland, or at least an exotic Vegas venue at the next blogger gathering. (I'm sure Thelma & Louise would pull you along if I'm not able to.)

And what's this about expecting to feel sorry for 'em?! Seriously!? You need some lessons in womanizing man! You're probably one to feel guilty in the morning too, huh? You need to get over this... (a sufficient indifference can save loads on breakfast expense!)

And dude, no offense... but your bachelor party experiences are completely ghey! No bachelor party should ever be able to be mistaken for a birthday party w/out the gifts.!? Your friends evidently don't know how to pick a best man! Video games are for any day... bachelor parties are for T&A!

1:14 PM  
Blogger The Wife said...

Lol . . . yeah . . . go ahead, take advice from Cayne . . . tell him to remember there is actually a difference between womanizing, and CLOSING the deal.

But if you wanted, we'd take you to a strip club . . . show you how to appreciate the ladies in style.

Cayne, we'll tie up in corner so he can watch, but not touch or speak.

10:16 PM  

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