The Contemplative, Defecating Me
Ever wonder what people in cars beside you are thinking? Ever wonder how much sheer brain power is happening within a mile of you? It kind of makes me think of The Matrix and how robots use energy from test-tube humans. A thought just popped into my head regarding which me is the real me. I know I'm a mix of all the mes... the happy ultimate frisbee playing and teaching me, the incredibly intelligent poker playing me, the idiotic drinking game me, the contemplative defecating me, the adventurous me, etc.
But there is something about being alone and by myself, usually when driving, running/biking, or falling asleep, that feels like the real me. I'm not influenced by anyone else, I don't have to put on a front, or try to entertain. I don't have to smile (a spooky side note, I was waiting for a light to change a few months ago and this woman in her 50s or 60s walked across the crosswalk with this incredibly large smile on her face, but the smile was so forced it was scary. I have no idea what possessed that woman to smile as she was walking down the street by herself, but I had this gut reaction that her smile was covering up something unhappy). When I'm in these "real me" situations, my brain is always going a mile a minute. I'm thinking about situations I'm in and all the different outcomes, which outcome I want, and how I might be able to get that by taking certain actions.
I wonder if the lady next to me in her SUV is just reciting her grocery list over and over again in her head, or if she, too, is tackling complex problems in her head.
But there is something about being alone and by myself, usually when driving, running/biking, or falling asleep, that feels like the real me. I'm not influenced by anyone else, I don't have to put on a front, or try to entertain. I don't have to smile (a spooky side note, I was waiting for a light to change a few months ago and this woman in her 50s or 60s walked across the crosswalk with this incredibly large smile on her face, but the smile was so forced it was scary. I have no idea what possessed that woman to smile as she was walking down the street by herself, but I had this gut reaction that her smile was covering up something unhappy). When I'm in these "real me" situations, my brain is always going a mile a minute. I'm thinking about situations I'm in and all the different outcomes, which outcome I want, and how I might be able to get that by taking certain actions.
I wonder if the lady next to me in her SUV is just reciting her grocery list over and over again in her head, or if she, too, is tackling complex problems in her head.
Labels: rambling
posted by MHG at
2/25/2010 07:08:00 PM
3 Comments:
I think about James Joyce. And flinging stuff:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ppShcRlJeZI
-DrC
PS. Actually, I was looking for an old Northern Exposure clip that was much more appropriate for your constipated musings, but this one will do.
She is thinking "Who the hell is that freak next to me".
Sorry about the late comment, but I had two thoughts about this post.
First, was "the contemplative defecating me" supposed to mean the part of you that is thoughtful while shitting or the part of you that is contemplating the shit you are going to take?
Second, there was a study that the mere act of smiling actually makes people happier. The facial movements can fool the brain. So, maybe she was forcing the smile to cheer herself up. Or, more likely, she's batshit crazy.
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